Today and last Friday were the end of era for me, my final day of classes and my final goodbye to high school. I didn’t feel very sad leaving, but I enjoyed my time at school, which moderates my feelings of happiness to finally be done with it. My exams start next week, and end about a month from now, so it’s too early to celebrate just yet. I’ll miss wearing the snazzy blazer and tie every day, a look I probably wouldn’t be able to pull off in the day time again for another 7 or 8 years… I’ll miss the support that school gives, especially my teachers who were the best a student could ask for, although I must admit I hated some of the ones I had before the last couple years. I’ll also miss the inter-school rivalries, the sports games and so on. I’ll miss the sense of tradition and pride that my school gave me and even the school song which takes on a whole new meaning in your final days. Despite the talk of some on the Roosh Forum about home schooling their kids, if I’m still in my city when I’m older I’d send my kids to my school in a heartbeat.
I won’t however miss all the work, getting up early every morning, even on Saturdays for sport. Oddly enough I don’t think I’ll miss the kids very much, which is weird because I was fairly popular at school but the last year or more has seen me out grow the more “beta” of my friends who I’d known since I was about 12. I ended up completely cutting off a group of guys and the unattractive group of girls (most were 4′s and 5′s) they hung out with because I just did not want to be around the guys pathetic behaviour anymore which had me cringing every single day, and now that schools over more of my friendships will probably drift away too.
Obviously being at the same school for 6 years I’ve changed dramatically. Going from a chubby nerd at 12 to a little shit (I fell in with your stereotypical highly-dysfunctional rich kid crowd) to becoming a much different person later on. I leave school without a chip on my shoulder, unless I don’t do as well as I hoped in the next month with my exams, I don’t have any regrets from my school days which I think is an achievement in itself.
Like I said though, as of right now I’m stressed like crazy, especially about Maths. Unlike everybody else in my family, I missed out on the “good at Maths and Science” gene. I quit science completely a long time ago, but unfortunately I’m required to an advanced Maths course that has been killing me all year. If I don’t do well enough on the exam, I’ll probably be forced to do a dreaded Arts degree, which I’d enjoy but definitely would slash my career prospects.
Aside from the past weekend I hadn’t been out to a party or to daygame in a month, and it will be another month till I have the chance again. I’m literally suffering withdrawal from daygame, I actually daydream about how much I’m going to once I finish exams. That’s how bad it is…
Style wise, despite the fact that my jeans are skinnier then I’d like to admit I usually dress pretty well for my age and get complimented on it quite often, but I need to invest in some decent threads for my summer wardrobe which is lacking in the quality department right now. Health wise as of late I’ve been stressed out like crazy because of exams, meditation hasn’t helped. Little exercise and over-eating has added 2-3 kgs of fat to my otherwise lean frame that I’m going to work off.
Graduation does however feel anti-climatic, as I’ll still be ducking in and out of school (but not in uniform) in the lead up to exams studying and meeting with my teachers. My Global Politics teacher whose in her mid-20′s and also went to my school (who by the way could easily be a catwalk model if she was a few inches taller) was telling me how it didn’t hit her that school was over until woke up the morning after her final exam and wondered what she was going to do for the next three months. I’m really excited for the future of course. 3 months of nothing but fuckloads of game, work, sleep, and gym will no doubt cause a transformation in itself on top of all the concerts and festivals. As will moving into the city early next year with two of my wings the same age.
A part of me is wondering if I’ll feel sad about graduating in a little while, but so far I’ve had none of that. It was funny watching all the girls cry after our final assembly though, as well as a couple of the biggest, tankest guys in the year level all bawling their eyes out. Right now I just badly want to get exams over with and be free of secondary education as soon as humanly possible. While I had a lot of great times and made a lot of memories I’ll carry with me for the rest of my days, I’m glad to be ending this chapter of my life without trying to cling onto it.
To my readers, and to the Class of 2012: See you on a dark night.
Starting Young & Aiming High